poetryaholic

i know, i know.
it's only been, what, 2 hours since my very first blog post? (or around there i am terrible at tracking time)
and already i've given up on capitalization. it's a waste really. the period is where the sentence definition is really at, guys!<--- oh and that little excited character.

anyway. here i am stuck inside with 8 inches of glorious snow outside my window! my roof has transformed into a sparkling white sea. and life is reflected in the glassy trees :)

on days like this i tend to either write or read. so i went back on some of my older stuff from last year. and figured, hey! i like blogging. so i'm gonna share some stuff! let people see the side that isn't so apparent all the time.

okay, this one kind of fits in with today as it is extremely cloudy. but i love the clouds!

disciple of the clouds

take me with you!
fingerpainted clouds as you softly run away.
take me with you, to see the world!
from above, how peaceful we all must look...
from up above, where the voices become a dulled song.
you have time to dream
as you float across the sky
and you nourish when you cry.
it's the most lovely and healing pain
when you decide to rain...
take me with you!
teach me to bless others with my sorrow!
teach me to be at peace!
teach me to fly, to see, to sing...
take me with you!
i will be the disciple of the clouds
i will see the world and see
that there is still good, amidst the clouds
from up above, i will learn
take me with you! take me with you...


and then there's this one, which has to do more with the rain

who am i?

raindrops and coffee beans;
amandy or the converse queen?
let's stand on the roof in the rain;
grab your hand and scream the trees.
pictures of my knife, memoirs of the pain;
burnt to ashes with love and hot tears.
my shattered heart forms in the pool below.
ashes to ashes, i sing aloud
life as the water droplets forming a cloud.
running, gasping, slamming doors...
you're too weak to open them.
but then you've probably already forgotten.
sobbing prayers into the arms of some angel...
to be noticed, to be loved..
i finally am chosen


ahh, and this is one of my odd attempts at homage to emily dickinson. but it relates because of the fire mention, and how many of you have fires going today, hmm?

incompatibility
(throwing the scabs back at you)

You're about as real as origami-
and just as flameable too
String you up like a paper crane-
Blow you out-make a wish-
The seance is just beginning-
But I'm leaving-for living laughter

Chalk can't write on-paper-
and pencils break on pavement
You couldn't change me-
and I just broke on-you-

You're about as real as a fountain drink-
and just as nasty too
Fill you up in my water bottle-
Crinkled up-thrown away-
The stream has starte dflowing-
But I'm leaving-for purified water

HI-C doesn't mix with-coke-
and coke shouldn't be diet
You didn't match with-me-
and I stayed cute, but rotted inside

You're faker than a DVD fire-
and just as cold too
Flip you up on the TV screen-
Stare, I'm bored-Stare, I'm lonely-
The picture falme is cracklin-
Wonder-what in the hell I'm doing

The writer didn't like his script
The script confused the-director-
You never really liked me
and I never, never got-you.



okay this next one doesn't TOTALLY relate, but it's another emily dickinson fan so...(it's actually also a lullaby although i haven't finished the melody)

Color Between the Dashes

Rainbow in the shadow-
oh-
why do you hide-so
Far away-
When you could easily brighten-
Up my day-hey-
Rainbow in the shadow
There's no time for-shallow
thinkin' today
We all have a need for honest feelin's-
So base this moment-on feelin'-wonderful
Rainbow in the shadow-
Reflecting through the window-
Oh-
My thoughts reflect-back-
Across the pages-of balloons-
And voyages-discovery.
Rainbow in the shadow-
I want to go-dance and move on-
But I want you to come along-
And, oh-
Color me the truest-way
Wash away the blacks-grays-white
Rainbow in the shadow
Oh-
Help these colors flow-together
I'll-remember-your lines of paint
and re-construct a life-for us-both
Step out of the shadow-
The rain has fallen-the sun is callin'


aha! I was desperately looking through my writing box for this next one...it distinctly has to do with snow! i wrote it last year when all was melting away, and i drove out to the vineyard just to have a moment with God in the parking lot..this was the obscure little result :p


I wish I could fly and
be liberated dfrom the ground, so quickly
that I'll fall amongst the clouds.
My red flames will be doused in eternal blue.
The surviving piles of snow might really
be clouds that floated down from heaven.
There's an earth-bound cloud nearby
Maybe it helped some angel down to comfort
me.
Where is God but all around?
The wind on my cheeks is his
comforting breath.
a train yells reminding me of other homes...
The sky reflects my thoughts
as it is somehow a quilt of my life.
Stretching out like I dumped all my memories onto a dance floor.
I think I might be reliving some
forgotten day...
It's hard to remember the antithesis
of life now and life then.
I'm seventeen...not ten?
It just goes to show how God
stays the same through it all
Real as today, as he was every yesterday.
the world and i can change, but He's
always the same
From Adam and Eve to me.
Amanda the child..Amanda the broken...Amanda the healed...
Amanda the chosen.


and here's something for today (I'm writing this now, so who nows how it will turn out?)

my ice cream is melting,
but the snow outside still glistens with
secret glee.
what do you know, little snowflake?
how can one little sculputure of perfection
fall from the sky and become something as vast
and brilliant as the ocean
they sparkle with a similar mischief,
a similar knowledge
secrets buried, to melt away
the snow melts, the clouds carry it away
and back into the ocean
where the melted flakes mesh with the water
they share secrets over tea and krill
and then back again to rain or snow...
sometimes they even talk about me, and you
i've met some decent snowflakes before
they kiss my cheek and dance in my hair
we talk; they tell me the news of the world
and then they melt away
to journey somewhere else
but we had a moment, white on red
and i learnt to be mischievous as them
and keep their little secrets
so when you see my smile
as i walk through a blizzard;
ask:
what do you know, little snowflake?
they are but dying to love you



and that's all for me, loves


for now. ;)

ciao bella

Surrender

I've done it. I've given into this blogging obsession that abounds around here.

This is so strange! I've gone back about three years to the xangaing years... ahh. Those were the days. Well. In a way. I suppose every farewell to the past is a good thing. Even if we have to wave goodbye to the good as well as the bad...

Anywho. I suppose that I should explain my name here. Well, actually three names. We'll start with super trooper. Wait, I lied. I want to start with Loony Daray. Translated loosely (from me piecing together some very weak Latin), it says Dark Insanity. This all goes back to my old friend Jessica (online friend). She was obsessed with pirates (as was everyone on our little forum), and she gave everyone pirate names! Mine was Aimie Swindler the Loon-Loony on deck. After that Loony became my gamer name/online name. para exemple, when I play Zelda I am always Loony instead of Link. Then I got bored of that and lengthened it. SO...yeah!

BTW, it's going to be very hard for me to continue typing properly and what not. All the years of AIM language have really inhibited my typing talent.

Anyway, the url for my site is DreamingOfFire. This goes way back to when I created my first website on xanga. Ever since then, every url has been the same. Xanga, myspace, photobucket, etc. (except I did have a second xanga dedicated solely to my writing that had a different unmentionable name). I'm not really sure what the story behind it is, except that I'm something of a pyromaniac.

Now back to the blog name! Super Trooper. Years and years ago, when I was Superchick's first number one fan (still am, loves), this was my favorite song. When the album first came out and I somehow got a hold of it, I fell in love with this song. (track 4 I think?). I would listen to it in my room and dance around and jump. The love has never died between us. My license plate has a plaque (soon to be put on) that says Super trooper 4 Jesus :D

anyway. the name explaining is done. that's all you guys get! I hope the parentheses weren't too annoying. I never realized how heavily I rely on them, but it is pretty ridiculous!

Sooo....
I guess that's all for me. I'll try not to post toooo much but I am one heck of a frequent blogger.

oh I do gotta should out a holla to God for all this snow and ice! it's absoluely beautiful on the one hand, and saved me from a calculus exam on the other!

alright
lots of love and hugs to everyone because my heart is bursting from this dive back into the blogging world! makes me love you all tons :D (Weird how i say "you all" even though i don't have any readers yet... oh well)
loony out!